May 11, 2009

Marriage Or Single ...

Recently one of my friends phoned me and quizzed, “Hey Roy, do you know I’m going to marry?” I joked, “Come on, how would I know because the guy isn’t me, is it?” Yes, my BEST girl—friend (I said, girl-friend) just got married.

I was thinking what would be the best gift to tease her before marriage and then found this book, Why Women Shouldn't Marry: Being Single by Choice. Written by single widow Cynthia S. Smith and her divorced daughter Hillary, this book showcases how women have long been driven to marriage by fears of their own inadequacies.

This book is an inspiration for any woman on the brink of giving up her independence to seek the security that the marriage promises. The authors interviewed many single, widowed, and divorced ladies to show that women should not sacrifice their lifestyles if a perspective life partner is only thinking of himself.

And of course, some very good messages and analysis exists in the many stories. Certainly worth additional re-reads as even a married woman can also learn a few things. 

What’s your take? Reasons for and against? Do you agree with the authors that women lose their identity in marriage?

6 comments:

WarmSunshine said...

Would you send in a copy of that??? My mom won't let me buy one of those as I'm getting hitched soon :D

who am i? said...

yeah to a large extent a woman does lose her identity,atleast in the initial yeras...n later on if some co2 remains...she bounces back too!

sadiya said...

I am definitely for marriage Roy, its the best thing to happen to any man/woman, all jokes we hear are just jokes....It could be the worlds second best relation after the parent child relationship,

I dont believe that women loose their id in marriage, infact I think she gets more acknowledged than ever, related to more adn in turn respected by more and cherished by more and adored by the special one you marry...and its the most beautiful feeling....you will beget a friend for life who will live with you, whom you can choose to make your best friend.....how does that sound???

Well my personal experience is I married my friend who later became my best friend.....positive experience begets positive comment you see Roy....touchwood touchwood....

as aptly quoted.....
Happy marriages begin when we marry the ones we love, and they blossom when we love the ones we marry.

I hope I inspired you enough ;), so when are we getting the good news???

Roy said...

@ Mehreen …

Always welcome. But remember this book is all about anti-marriage philosophy. Can you handle its side-effect?


@ Mangla …

Hey, thanks for dropping. Yes, they bounce back. Maybe that’s why, they are the real winners.


@ Sadiya …

Hey, it’s soooo sweet of you.
I totally agree what you’ve said.

You know, a bad experience can be a caution mark but not the guiding light.

I believe, Naushad bhaisaab can’t ask better than anything having Sadiya in his life.

You both are really COMPLETE!

In You
He Sees The Doorway To A Thousand Zannat
In You
He Sees The Light And The Heat
In You
He Is Complete
~ Peter Gabriel


You know, in my childhood, I’m very passionate to get married.But there was problem - before 21, any guy can't get married. When I reached 21, I was too busy to decide which friend to marry. And when, I finally decided whom to marry, they already got married :)

Now, I’m inspired again [ha ha ha ha]

But whenever, the good news would hit, you people have to fly to India.

Cheers!

Divi said...

Hey Roy,

mm according to me, Get married, understand your parter, do not bother about the difference of opinions between you and your parter. Coz... opinions differ person to person... so cant help.. but we can accept the difference as it is.. and go on with your liking with difference of opinion....

So when is ur marriage ?
Will I get the invitation ???

Divi

Roy said...

Hi Divi,

Exactly, it’s not abt finding the perfect person; it’s all about accepting the imperfect person perfectly.

Invitation? Ummmm!

You have to promises first that you’d come :)

Cheers!